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Building an Agreement Frame

This pattern creates a common or joint outcome that both parties in a conflict or negotiation can agree to:

Practice Example:

  • 1. Specify a situation where you are negotiating between two people.
  • 2. Ask each for their outcome and backtrack.
  • 3. Find a common outcome that both can agree to.
  • 4. Use CONDITIONAL CLOSE, below, to deliver.
  • 5. If there are objections:
    • A. Ask each what their idea or objection is intended to accomplish. Go meta to that (...and what will that get for you?) until you arrive at an outcome each can agree on.
    • B. Ask each what will happen if they don't reach an agreement. Use this option if the parties are being uncooperative or argumentative

Conditional Close

This frame helps you determine from the outset what issues need to be satisfied before a solution can be finalized.

Practice Example:

  • 1. 'A' makes proposal to 'B'.
  • 2. 'B' raises an objection.
  • 3. 'A' backtracks 'B's objection.
  • 4. Make the conditional close:
    • If I can satisfy your objection, then you would agree to 'X', is that correct?
  • 5. If no, go back to step 2 and ask for all objections, then follow through the steps again.
  • 6. If yes, have fun!

Often, it is best to have someone trained in NLP to walk you through this pattern. Experience can shed some light on the areas that aren't entirely clear. If anything sounds a little confusing, give yourself plenty of time to think about it and you'll figure it out. If you have any questions, E-mail me and I'll help you as time permits.

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